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local area man can finally I.D. individual Olsen twins by name

"It took extensive study and a lot of internet time, but I can finally do it!!" Such was the exclamation of Warren Didier, 48 year old maintenance supervisor, when he made the breakthrough just last

Michael Jackson still incredibly creepy

In a recent random survey, 97% of the public still consider Michael Jackson 'The creepiest individual I've ever seen".

Workplace

Man tries to put hooker on expense statement, but over $100 needs receipt
Shared iTunes library filled with religious stuff; co-workers attempt to identify, avoid source
truck driver snags executive position after watching 2 video professor cd's
'Afternoon delight' stuck in coworker's head for 2 weeks, causes brain tumor

Current Events

Identity thieves petition congress for easier credit standards
Rascal brake tampering scandal
Iraq director of tourism blows up own office in frustration
Scientists: "Hadron collider pretty much a let-down"

Home & Family

Obese man decides time has come to become bed-bound
Loving husband prefers wife comatose
87% of women surveyed: "Husband is total idiot"
Man wishes last name were Oppenheimer
Local man secretly enjoys pre-teen sitcoms

Science & Technology

Supporting mom's computer problems drives man insane
Oil Executives – “Pickens wind plan will stop earth from spinning”
Scientists create device to tap power of teen gossip; world's energy problems solved
Hubble Scientists - "This shit is really far away"

Celebrity

local area man can finally I.D. individual Olsen twins by name
Michael Jackson still incredibly creepy

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